Sehnsucht

Sehnsucht - German for desire, longing, yearning.

******

Coming across this word in a postcard, it pretty much sums up what I've been mulling in my mind over the past 3 weeks.

A lot of things have been troubling my heart. I've experienced nights where I'd suddenly wake up, confused, disoriented, unsure if I'm in the right place, afterall.

This feeling of "not knowing if I'm supposed to be here, or elsewhere" has probably escalated with Regina's long term plan of studying in the US. It's a good plan for her - boyfriend's posted to New York, she likey to join him while taking out a crushing bank loan to finance her studies and possibly working abroad.

Funny how similar her plans were to my dreams once, oh-so-long-ago.

Or is it too late to even have these dreams now?